Not Bodek...But it could be!

Meme, Myself & I and What The Heck is That Chumra?

For those of you who feel in necessary to know more about me, it has been suggested that I do a Meme. I do not like to put out too much information, as I enjoy the illusion of privacy my blog gives me. However, I will share a few things.
1. When I saw the term Meme, this is what I thought:




2. I feel compelled to make my chicken soup for Shabbos on Wednesday night so the fat can be skimmed off.
3. I have a fear of spiders. It makes me want to watch every "big scary spider" documentary to battle my phobia. I will not watch Arachnophobia. I will look at a Tarantula. I try not to kill spiders because it's stupid to kill anything that doesn't harm you, and they eat mosquitoes which I'm not afraid of but I hate (one day Jacob Da Jew will write about his mosquito infested yard, and the battle to remain outside).
4. I find it funny when Mrs. LFD reads my posts to make sure there is no Loshon Harah. You should see the stuff she makes me delete. Good for her!
5. I do not wear a Black Hat. I am the only member of my shul that does not.
6. I get irritated when I don't get enough feedback on a post, especailly if there is someone who used to comment, and doesn't anymore.


O.K. A switch in topic. Here is my non chumra. I like my chulent to not dry out, so I put a inverted ceramic cup on the top of my crock pot to keep moisture in. My mother in law stopped by on a Friday afternoon, looked at the cup and asked me "Where did this Chumra come from?" I had to think about what the heck she was talking about, until she noticed the confused look on my face and said "The cup. What have they come up with that a cup needs to be on the crock pot?". I explained my reason, and told her there ws no chumra.We both had a good laugh, but it shows how "Lakewood Falling Down" can get people to think.

Chumras I'd Like To See

Well, whether it's Chanukah or Pesach, every time of the year is good to make chumras. The newest one is separate shopping lines for men and women, which Mrs. LFD says reminds her of public bathrooms. The girls line will always be 10x as long. Anyway, this was interesting. While in shul last Shabbos, Gilmour points out to me that there are five people standing around the Bima. The Gabbi and the person standing opposite him, the Baal Korei, the person getting the aliya, and the person who got the last aliya. They were all "shuckleing" at vastly different rates, with minor variations on twists and bounces and head shakes. The Baal Korei was holding on to the Eitz Chaim and shuckeling at warp 8 and looked as if he was gong to increase to warp 9.9 soon. It was really quite dizzying, and also superhuman that he was able to keep the place. I thought he might actually pop the Torah off of the Bimah! Gilmour starts cracking up because it looked like a bizarre tribal dance gone wrong. It got me to thinking, why shouldn't the Chumrah Police make regulations to how people can shuckle? This would regulate what is a self stimulatory behavior, and decrease accidental bumping by at least 2% annually. Some more chumras I'd like to see:

1. When Davening in a particular Shul, one must use the pronunciation the masses use. (Elokei-nee, Booo-reeech, mandatory rolling of "Raish" is Sefardi shuls). It makes for Achdus!

2. Enforcers to throw rocks at people who don't answer "Good Shabbos" when the greeting is given. If Bain Adam L'chavairo is more important tha Bain Adam L'Makom, it should be a Mitzvah to throw rocks at obnoxious people.

3. A ban on shuls with no candyman.

4. A manditory Q&A session at the end of Shabbos Drashos. It would make Rabbeim think twice before introducing something to the masses if they know they will be hit up with 20 questions in a public forum.

5. The use of the word "Goyish". The excuse people give their kids many times is that "it's goyish". How smart our kids would be if we had to actually know why we do or don't do something.

6. Smoking (pet peeve-LOZ, I know it's been banned, but not by the heilige Chumara Police!).

That's it for now. feel free to add to the list!

You Bad Hot Chanie!

While reading Rav Elyashiv's comments about sheitels on YWN, I felt annoyed. Lion of Zion pointed out to me the following:
"hakham ovadia yosef has already assured all sheitlach. period. it seems some ashkenazim now are just catching up to this (wouldn't want the sephardim to seem frumer.) on the other hand, iirc the lubavatcher rebbe said sheitlach are preferred, because a woman is likely to take it off than a hat. gluckel of hameln (17th c. ashkenaz) writes in her memoirs that she was impressed with the frumkeit of the men when she moved to metz because they didn't wear wigs (or something like that, it's been a while since i read her book)"
Comments anyone?